I knew at the end of the evening last night, M would have plans for us. I knew there would be a sexual experience and that was extremely erotic to look forward to, but I looked forward much more than that. I looked forward to the dressing up, the closeness, the dancing and talking and enjoying one another’s company. The evening far exceeded my imagination.
Before we even left, he had prepared our room for the activities, pulling back the blankets and sheet, laying out a length of rope, our scarf, two floggers, the crop, the Hitachi and one plug….and the first set of stockings I ripped getting dressed. He made sure it was all laid out so that when I retrieved the last bit of my outfit from the bedroom, I’d see it just before we left…..and I’d anticipate all evening.
At the wedding, as we stood, watching and listening to the vows, M kept winking and wiggling his nose at me. When I leaned in and asked what he was doing, he said, “It’s Morse Code, it means I’m going to do unspeakable things to you later.” All I could do was grin, ear to ear. And blush a little, I mean, he was so hot in his suit and he was thinking about me, knowing I was thinking about him, fueling that anticipation.
We danced closely, a few kisses, my head resting in his jaw, gently gripping hands, savoring the closeness and inhaling his scent. He whispered in my ear that I was the most beautiful woman in the room. I believed him.
I had left the table for a moment and as he sat, waiting for me to return, I saw the look on his face as I walked to him. His eyes followed me, lit up, a slight grin….it was desire and pride I saw. When I sat down he said, “You are a gorgeous woman. You look like a woman walking across the room. Not a girl or a lady, a woman.” His woman.
His hand came to rest on my leg or on the back of my neck, unconsciously, all evening. He leaned in for a kiss or to whisper that he loved me many times. He could not stop complimenting the way I looked.
All evening long, do you know what I felt? Yes, anticipation of the end of the evening activities, but much, much more than that. It was simple, but it was was most gigantic, overflowing feeling. I felt like more than his wife. I felt like he chose me every second, every minute. I felt like I belonged.
Before we left the wedding, he made sure I wasn’t wearing any panties, because he had plans for the ride home.
And, what we did when we returned home – it wasn’t unspeakable. It was beautiful. It was two people, madly and passionately in love, expressing themselves in their truest forms, bared to one another and connected in a way neither thought possible.
In fact, I don’t want to speak about it, I want to shout about it. I want to shout to the clouds how this man makes me feel like I’ve never felt before. Not just the pleasure he elicits from my body in those beautiful experiences, but the ongoing sense of belonging he brings me, the safety he creates and the desire that flows between us – it is what makes my world go round. I want to tap on the shoulder of everyone I pass and share my joy.
I’m passing along some of my joy tonight. I’m sharing my smile with you.