Since we’ve returned from our vacation, something has shifted. We had that ongoing aftercare issue before we left, which M has done splendidly with, and I know he feels good about that. So do I, it’s brought us closer. But, it’s more than that.
After the long ride home from our vacation, M told me he’d done some thinking. He said he’d be exerting more control, tightening the reigns in some areas. After some thought, I wondered what I’d done wrong, so I asked. He explained that I’d done nothing wrong. He just noticed there were some ways he could improve and said, “I thought you wanted me to figure this out on my own,” with that confident grin that makes my heart skip a beat. All I could do was anticipate. Sit back and enjoy where we are heading.
Since that day, he feels stronger to me. He holds his chest a little higher, walks a little taller. He addresses anything he sees (more so than before) without hesitation. I get more ‘looks’ and warnings, even more playful, suggestive ones.
He’s been more confident and playful in ways that he hasn’t before sexually. He’s always been silly, but this is more challenging and commanding. It’s sexy as hell.
“Just one more,” as his hand gently massages red, stingy skin.
“We’re not finished yet.”
“Give it to me, it’s mine. You’re mine.”
“Oh, well. That’s two for flinching.” I could hear his silly, evil grin. I said, “Are you serious?” To which he responded, “Yes, I’m serious. You flinched.” Those whacks were hard. I loved them. I loved what came next, too. And next.
He has been comfortable for a long while pulling my hair, asking me to do things, telling me what to do, being rough with his grips and grabs and his hand on my throat. But, since then, he’s been more. More of all of that. Less asking, more telling. Maneuvering my body with muscle, taking what he wants, no hesitation, fluid. His presence fills the room. My body buzzes and hums for him. In response to him.
But, with all of this, sexual or not, he has my brain on fire. He invades all my thoughts, like never before. And my heart can’t even contain my love anymore. It’s more. He’s more. We’re more.
It feels fantastic.