“Don’t look away, eyes straight ahead,” he directed, after positioning her precisely where he wanted her.
Wanting nothing more than to please him, she dare not avert her gaze, but the truth was that she wouldn’t have looked away even if he hadn’t told her not to. She was captivated. Mesmerized.
So many times before they’d experienced a similar scenario. Logistically it wasn’t much different. Bent over one side of the bed, her palms were flat on the mattress, feet shoulder width apart. Behind her, he stood readying for what was to come.
On the bench at the foot of the bed lay a plethora of toys and implements, none of which were new. She’d felt each one at his hand before, she’d been overwhelmed and pushed and challenged by each one. Craving the symbiotic exchange, a tethering force between them, she absorbed and savored his energy and desire each and every time they came together, two as one.
Never was she more alive than when she was at his mercy.
Yet, this time in the cabin he’d rented, there was a mirror opposite her, on the wall next to the other side of the bed. Looking forward, she saw with her eyes what her heart had felt so strongly, that for which her soul had always longed.
On his face, was this stunningly sly smile. His hands were all intent as they chose this implement or that, his weight shifting with purpose as he positioned himself for each whoosh or crack or sting. Normally her eyes would close as she sunk into herself, only feeling him, connected to him, but this time, all she could do was stare at him in the mirror. Her eyes would instinctively blink with each strike, but they never remained closed. She watched as he pushed her, as he admired the marks on her flesh, deliberately aiming for just the spot he intended to strike.
She saw him, alive in having her at his mercy. Alive in being himself.
But it was his eyes, oh god. They stole her breath away. His eyes owned her.
She’d thought she couldn’t feel any more alive, that her soul had been set free simply in the offering of herself to him. But that was before she saw their reflection in the mirror, before she saw it in his eyes that day.
That was before she realized her entire soul belonged to him. She was His.
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